What I had to write for a newsletter:
Halloween is just around the corner, it’s almost time to start designing those costumes for the big night. Whether you’re dressing up to go out with friends, or helping your children look their best for a little trick-or-treating, we want to see your outfits! Send your pictures through to (name) at (emailaddress).com.
What I wanted to write, but would probably get fired for it:
Halloween is just around the corner, almost time to extort candy out of gullible adults in exchange for not causing criminal damage to their property! To help continue and encourage this purile and outdated custom, we are having a fancy dress competition! Send us pictures of either you dressing up to look like a goth prostitute/complete moron or your little snot-faced brats looking like rejects from a Stephen King movie, so we can laugh about how silly the costumes look and how little time you put into it before giving up and buying one from Walmart.
Oh… for an honest world….
Fourteen Twenty 
second draft is best dude.
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Hey man … I dig the new lay out. Big improvement over the last one (which was a little too dark for my liking). Nice work.
Oh yeah, also dig that pic of your brother. Well done.
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omg you are such a creep talking about little kids like they aren’t actual humans and whatnot.
just kiding.
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